So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
