i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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