I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
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