I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
