Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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