I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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