doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize