Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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