I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
So apparently I’m into choking now
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
