you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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