New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I think I just shit out all my problems.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
