Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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