good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
