Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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