i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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