Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
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