Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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