I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Randomize