the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
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