Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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