Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Randomize
