i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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