i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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