Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize