are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
