Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people

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(518): View more from New York

for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt

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(541): View more from Oregon

So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display

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(479): View more from Arkansas

When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(617): View more from Massachusetts

I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine

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(909): View more from California

He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.

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(512): View more from Texas

Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.

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(650): View more from California

FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.

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