Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(304): View more from West Virginia

I smell stomach acid.

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(856): View more from New Jersey

I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw

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(409): View more from Texas

It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.

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(864): View more from South Carolina

I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(508): View more from Massachusetts

i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.

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(213): View more from California

Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.

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(941): View more from Florida

Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.

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