one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize