I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
