i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
