Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
