Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize