Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
