so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Randomize
