i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize