I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
try to milk me bitch
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize