i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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