i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize