I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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