Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Randomize
