absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Randomize
