where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize