Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
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