Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize