also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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