Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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