Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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