Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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