...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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