I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
