i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
That's when you crack a 10am beer
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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